TV Night In Bricksburg
by LauraCynthia
Summary: Emmet and Lucy watch TV together Tonight on: "Where Are My Pants?" A special guest star! Milk! Cheesy jokes! Outtakes! Lots of laughs! And of course, paaaaaaants!


"Hurry up, Lucy, you're going to miss the show." Emmet plopped down on the couch, a bucket of LEGO popcorn in one hand, shoveling it into his mouth. "Mmm, mmm, you make really good popcorn," he mumbled through a mouthful of round white bits. "Did I ever tell you that?"

"Just getting the drinks, hang on." Lucy poured a pitcher of yellow LEGO bits into two small cups. "Be there in a flash." She zoomed past the fridge, ripped the door open and threw the jug in, bouncing it closed with one foot. "Whoa," she shouted, trying to keep her balance as she hopped over to the couch. "UH!" She did a flying leap and landed next to Emmet. Her seat lowered and popped him up in the air, smacking his head on the ceiling.

"Ah!" He landed back down on his side, popping her upwards.

"Eek!" she shouted, raising both drink cups above her head as she soared upwards. Gravity brought her back to the seat, sending him flying again…

* * *

 ** _FIVE MINUTES LATER_**

Emmet and Lucy leaned back, breathing rapidly. Popcorn and lemonade was everywhere. "Okay…" Emmet began, holding his head, "Maybe…looking back…a see-saw couch wasn't the best idea…"

"Wow. You think?" Lucy groaned, covering her eyes. "So…what show is it we're watching tonight?"

Emmet reached for the remote and clicked it on. "You know."

Lucy closed her eyes. "Ugh. Not 'Where Are My Pants' _again…_ "

Emmet waved his hands in the air. "No, no. This is a really, really special one. One of our friends is going to be in it!"

"Who?" Lucy asked.

Emmet continued to watch the screen. "Good Cop/Bad Cop, playing himself."

Lucy covered her eyes with both hands. "Don't tell me _he_ can't find his pants either."

Emmet elbowed her in the side. "Shh, Lucy, here it is!"

* * *

The wife was bent over in front of the house, digging in the garden and planting tulip bulbs. Her husband came out the front door and stood on the porch, as usual, pantsless. He looked over at her, head rotating. "Honey, where are my paaaaaaants?"

A police car pulled up in the driveway, siren chirping. Both husband and wife turned. The husband's face turned pink as Good Cop/Bad Cop stepped out of the car, happy face turned forwards. "All right, sonny. Put your hands where I can see them…"

Lucy and Emmet exchanged a small chuckle.

* * *

 *****OUTTAKES*****

The director clicks the board. "Take one."

Good Cop/Bad Cop steps out of the car as Good Cop. "All right, sonny. Put your pants where I can see them…"

The husband frowned, shrugging. "I wish I could." He and his wife share a laugh with the crew and the audience.

Bad Cop appears. "You idiot! It's 'hands', not 'pants'! Read the script" he growled, shaking a thick stack of pages in the air.

Good Cop appears, looking sheepish. He puts one hand to his mouth. "Oh, dear, I flubbed it. I'm just so nervous…"

Bad Cop appears, frowning. "You, sir, are a disgrace to the acting profession!"

Good Cop appears, looking dejected. "I'll try to do better next time."

Bad Cop appears, snarling. "No you won't! It's **my** turn now!"

Good Cop appears, walking away. "Okay."

* * *

The director clicks the board. "Take 2"

Bad Cop steps out of the car and pulls his gun. The husband and wife gasp. "Freeze, turkey! Pants in the air!" Everyone laughs. He whips his head around. "What? What? Stop that! No laughing!" He pulls his gun on the audience and a high pitched falsetto scream comes from them.

Good Cop appears, sighing. He lowers the gun. "One more time please."

* * *

The director appears a third time. "Take 3."

Good Cop comes out of the car without pants on. "All right, sonny. Put your hands…" He looks around behind him. "Am I the only one who feels a draft in here? Anyone? Anyone?"

Bad Cop appears. "Yeah, I feel it, too."

Good Cop appears. He looks down and blushes, covering his front. "Oh, dear, now I'm going to have to arrest myself." Everybody laughs.

In the background, the husband is standing on the porch, wearing the cop's pants. "Looking for these, hotshot?"

Bad Cop appears, scowling at them. "Hey! Give those back, you thief!"

The husband and wife shut the door and lock themselves inside the house. Bad Cop runs up to their porch and bangs on the door with his fist. "Open up in the name of the law!"

"We're not home right now…." A muffled sing-songy voice calls from inside.

Good Cop opens the mail slot. "May I please borrow your chair?"

"Sure."

"Thank you." Bad Cop appears and grabs the porch chair and starts slamming it repeatedly against the door of the house. Meanwhile, the husband and wife sneak out the back door, shushing the audience.

* * *

The husband walks into the living room, pantsless. His wife is watching what appears to be "The Lego Movie" on TV. "Honey, where are my paaaaaants?" he asks.

She sighs and switches off the TV set. Walking up to her husband slowly, she grabs him by the collar and drags him up the stairs, his body bumping the steps as she does. "Honey-ow-what are you-hey- doing-ouch?"

She yanks him down the hall and into the bedroom, plops him down in a sitting position on the bed and throws open a closet door to reveal an entire closet that is wall-to-wall pants of various colors and styles. "There! Happy?!" she shouts, before stalking out of the room and slamming the door behind her.

He falls backwards on the bed and sighs, then sits up again, rubbing his neck, confused. "What was that all about?"

* * *

Emmet snorted and rolled around on the couch, laughing so hard that he fell apart, spilling pieces everywhere. His head rolled under the couch. "Oopsie…I'm okay. Put me back together again?" he asked a horrified Lucy who cried out and threw her hands up in the air.

* * *

 ** _TWO MINUTES LATER_**

"So, what did you think?" a whole Emmet asked, switching off the TV. He grinned at her. "Awesome, right?"

Lucy stared ahead for a few seconds, putting her hand on her chin. "You know, it actually _was_ pretty good today. At least it wasn't the same old, same old, blah." She stuck out her tongue, frowning and licked her lips. "I'm thirsty."

"I know, right? Watching TV _always_ makes _me_ thirsty." Emmet slid off the couch and headed into the kitchen. "What do you want?"

Lucy thought for a moment, looking around the messy living room. "Hmmm…not lemonade. How about milk?"

"Perfect," Emmet said. "Will you help me clean up afterwards?"

"Yeah, sure." Lucy stood up as Emmet came back in the room with two glasses of white LEGO bits on a tray. She took one and sniffed it. "You're sure this isn't soap, right?"

"Sure I'm sure." Emmet replied. He drank his down in one gulp. It left a milk mustache on his face. "Mmm. Want some more?"

Lucy drank hers and sported a similar mustache. She wiped it away. "Okay."

Emmet went into the kitchen and came back quickly with a carton of milk.

As he poured it, Lucy frowned. "'Perfect'?"

Emmet stopped pouring. "What?"

"You said milk was 'perfect'. Why?"

"Oh, that!" Emmet bounced in theair. "I meant because of the show we just watched!" Emmet passed her the carton. "It's a _special_ commemorative milk carton! Look at the side!"

Lucy took the carton and looked at it, seeing a black and white photograph of a front and side view of a pair of LEGO trousers. Above the photos: " ** _Have You Seen Me?_** ". Below: **_"Call 1-800-PAA-ANTS"._**

She facepalmed. "Please, _please_ tell me you didn't try to call that number."

Emmet frowned, shaking his head. "Nope. Haven't seen 'em." He shuffled his feet and gazed down, grabbing one arm with his opposite hand. Blushing, he looked up at her. "Beside, the line's always busy when I call."

Lucy blinked. She turned her head to the side. "I knew it."


End file.
